PicoBlog

Howdy Lovelets!

For the last month I’ve been on a speaking tour across Europe (although I keep thinking of it as more of a spiritual retreat than a tour, which is a nice feeling), and one of the things I find myself doing again and again on stage is quoting these lines from the great Sufi poet and mystic Hafiz:

The subject tonight is love   

and for tomorrow night as well.

As a matter of fact

I know of no better topic

for us to discuss

until we all die!

Those lines are as good a theme song for this project as anything could ever be. For love is indeed our subject, and there is no better topic, and I am looking forward to talking about it forever with you, until we all die. FUN!

Friends, we have so much healing to do around this word love. That word has been crammed into so many weird and distorted shapes and limitations, which has caused many of us to grow up with weird and distorted little hearts. When ideal romantic partnership and sexual attractiveness become the only proof that you are lovable, or when you are taught by your family and/or culture that love can only be earned through your own perfect behavior or comportment, or when love becomes something that you are constantly waiting for — or waiting to become worthy of — it makes a spirit wither in sadness, or a heart grow hollow in fear.

But when love becomes THIS — what we are doing here, this expansive, rich, ever-available, deeply affectionate, profoundly intimate, sacred experience of marrying the heart back to its wild and mysterious and enchanted source of creation — then life suddenly gets juicy again. And how!

Our guest this week is the exquisite poet Megan Falley, who brings up the profoundly important subject of “lovability” — something that many of us have struggled with our whole lives. Are we lovable? Are we worthy of being seen? Are we good enough? Have we earned the gift of Unconditional Love? Are we totally alone in this exhausting hellscape of life, or is something always with us? Is the answer to all our yearning to be found somewhere out there in the world, or through the love of another human being, or is it available from deep within our own hearts?

Brave voyagers, let’s go find out.

Welcome to another exciting chapter of Letters From Love!

Love,

Your Lizzy

Dear Love, what would you have me know today about my lovability?

Oh, my tiny little roasted chestnut, come to me ANY TIME to talk about this! Any time! I will go over this subject with you from now until God leaves Chicago, and it is okay if you need constant repetition and reassurance of this in order to finally understand the glorious truth of your absolute lovability. I delight in telling you. I DELIGHT IN YOU.

You want proof?

Well, sugar butt, of course you do — you grew up in a world that is a tense courtroom where everything must be proven in order to keep you safe, and so you are constantly putting on your efficient business-lady suit and sensible pumps, and wheeling into the courtroom a rolling caddy covered with files — all of which you will attempt to use in order to PROVE THINGS, in order to stay safe, but none of which you need, because it turns out there is no courtroom, there is no judge, there is no jury, there is no prosecutor (except the one who lives within your own still sometimes tormented mind) and you are free to go outside at any time, take off your shoes, walk in the grass, and get an ice cream cone.

Court is adjourned, precious seed of light, for the verdict was rendered long before the Earth’s crust cooled: you are lovable.

You are lovable not for what you have done or not done, achieved or not achieved, created or not created. You are lovable not for your good deeds or your appearance or cleanliness or tidiness or promptness or usefulness or prosperity or actions, or because you have washed your soul or spirit clean. You are lovable not because you have done your time in penance, or tried to be of service, or tried to make it up to people, or tried to do better, or tried to improve yourself, or tried to save the world, or tried ANYTHING.

Sweetheart. You are lovable because we made you. We made you because we want you to be here. We want you to be here so we can delight in you. We made you because we want to watch you live. We made you because you are love, and your existence carbonates our hearts.

“Who is WE?” immediately wants to know the foreman of the jury inside your mind, the keeper of all rational thought, who is sick of this strange talk and wants to get to the bottom of things.

Oh silly taco, who are we? We are the light. We are God. We are your ancestors and predecessors and forerunners. We are the dream of past and future. We are your spirit guides. We are the ideas of creativity that love to play with you. We are all the animals. We are the oceans — on this planet and all the planets. We are the stars. We are every teacher you have ever had. We are sleep. We are coffee. We are poetry. We are friendship. We are mercy. We are belonging. We are the consortium of mysteries that call ourselves Love — and we made you, and we keep remaking you every day, because we love you.

We can’t get enough of you, honeycakes.

If you need more proof than these words, trust me, you will only suffer. We say this not as a threat, but out of love. Call off the search, baby girl. Stop looking into the eyes of other people to find out if you are lovable — they don’t even know what THEY are half the time, how on earth could they know what you are?

Look only to us to tell you what you are.

You are one of us. You are one of ours. You are ours. And we are yours.

Hoping this settles the matter, and if not — come back in a few minutes, and ask again. We never get tired of talking to you. We’re just happy to see you.

Let’s keep going.

Love, LOVE

This week, if you are a person who struggles whether frequently or occasionally with questions of self-worth (which is to say, if you are a human being), try asking this question: Dear Love, what would you have me know about my lovability?

Or, since so many of us find it easier to give love and mercy to others than to acknowledge that we too are deserving, you can try this remix if it feels relevant for you: Dear Love, what would you have me know today about why it is easier to give love to others than to myself?

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