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Sweet Jesus, it’s Morphin Time! The beautiful thing about that sentence is that almost every movie in this franchise would be suitable for this newsletter, but today I decided to take it back to 1995 when I was 7 years old and obsessed with these characters, as was the fashion at the time. I recently ended up reading something about a random episode on Reddit and went down a rabbithole to watch the first five-part miniseries of the television program’s initial run and I decided, damn, I think I need to do the movie. I must admit, I did not think today’s feature had as low of a Rotten Tomatoes score as it does (32%), which makes this even sweeter.

What are we talking today? Obviously, it’s Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie, the 1995 big screen adaptation of the runaway kids’ TV show made of spliced Japanese Bandai/Saban footage with American actors redoing the out-of-costume parts. If you were a child of a certain age at that time, this series may have appealed to you greatly. Rewatching the classic five-part “Green with Evil” earlier this week, where Tommy joins the cast, reminded me that despite the special effects being low-budget even for 1993, this show was fun and entertaining, especially if the market demographic is kids under ten. The movie, which premiered not even two years after the show’s debut, was obviously a cash-grab to sell different versions of the same action figures and toys, but it worked. I even had all the McDonald’s Happy Meal tie-in toys. This was basically one long episode but the budget was bigger and, it being a popular kids’ franchise and summer movie, did end up making 6x its budget back. This one was directed by Bryan Spicer, a legendary Nickelodeon show director who, upon inclusion of this movie in the newsletter, has now had all of his Feature Length Films covered in an issue. Damn. If you can’t have a notable, successful career, at least Stale Popcorn’s got your back! Now that I’ve got you all excited, let’s activate our Megazords and press play.

Our movie begins with a scrolling backstory of Zordon and Alpha 5 creating the command center and the Power Rangers and their Zords to right off the forces of evil. C’mon, we all know. We cut to the gang, Rocky (Steve Cardenas) the Red Ranger, Tommy (Jason David Frank) the White Ranger, Kimberly (Amy Jo Johnson) the Pink Ranger, Billy (David Yost) the Blue Ranger, Aisha (Karan Ashley) the Yellow Ranger and Adam (Johnny Yong Bosch) the Black Ranger, outside of battle and about to skydive from an airplane with their schoolmate antagonists Bulk (Paul Shirer) and Skull (Jason Narvy). The bullies nearly dive out of the plane without parachutes but fortunately Kimberly and her gorgeous smile saves them from death by suggesting they strap up. Sorry if I sound like I’m objectifying Kimberly in this review. Amy Jo Johnson was my first crush when I was five. This goes way back. The plainclothes Rangers do some cool sky tricks while heading back toward the ground, clearly choreographed to kill as much screentime as possible having these teens do cool looking shit. A young boy Fred (Jamie Croft) watches as the gang lands on a target and tells his dad (Peter Mochrie) to be more like the teens. This is for some kind of charity fundraiser? Because why wouldn’t it be. They’re raising money to…view Ryan’s Comet which will pass Angel Grove in a few days?? How much money does it cost to look at the sky? Fred and his dad congratulate Tommy on the landing. The gang suggests Bulk and Skull landed on the roof of the youth center where Ernie (Richard Genelle) is offering free ice cream sundaes for all participants. In reality, Bulk and Skull are scared to jump and wait til the last minute before launching.

On the streets of Angel Grove, the gang rollerblades to a cover of “Free Ride” by Dan Hartman who originally wrote the song. Dan Hartman had some disco BANGERS if you feel like going off on a Spotify tangent. They do cool like backflips and shit on their roller blades. This is the scene I remember most from seeing it in theaters. Bulk and Skull eventually land in a construction site, much to the chagrin of the workers. The construction crew has no time for the bullies, however, as they have just unearthed a manhole cover with a dragon-like design on it. Not knowing what it is and having learned literally nothing from any science fiction media of the past 70 years, these guys decide to…remove the giant covering. Out pours the smoke and, as you’d expect, a giant metal hand with claws clutching a giant purple egg. Oldest story in the book. A worker goes to touch the egg and is electrocuted. The gang continues to roller blade across town n their color-coded skates when the Ranger pager goes off. Alpha 5 (Peta Maree Rixon, voiced by Richard Wood) summons the Rangers to the command center for an emergency and the gang teleports out. The command center looks so much better in the movie. As stated, I just watched the Green Ranger miniseries and it’s nice to see that the bigger budget went to something on this movie. Zordon (Robert L. Manahan, the second Zordon) beams his big ass bald holographic head down to, you guessed it, tell the Rangers that they must act swiftly or the entire world will collapse. He gives the teens the background story of Ivan Ooze (Paul Freeman), the Villain of the Week: Big Screen Edition. Four score and six thousand years ago, Ooze built some machines that would enslave the planet but a proto-group of Power Rangers from back then stopped him and locked him in a cryogenic chamber, a thing notorious for existing 6000 years ago. But now, Ivan’s been let loose because the teens didn’t think to like seal it or anything, just left it out to be constructed upon. Billy looks extremely worried. For some reason, the enslavement devices were…buried near Ooze’s grave? Instead of just like being destroyed? So Zordon rightfully worries that Ooze will access them if he gets out. Duh, why didn’t you worry about that 6000 years ago? Christ.

At night, the hand with the egg is being guarded by nightwatchmen when Rita Repulsa (Julia Cortez, voiced by Barbara Goodson) and her band of misfits Goldar (Kerry Casey, voiced by Kerrigan Mahan), Lord Zedd (Mark Ginther, voiced by Robert Axelrod) and Mordant (Jean Paul Bell, voiced by Martin G. Metcalf) arrive to knock out the guards. Zedd uses his magical staff to open the egg. Rita swirls her fingers around in the purple ooze inside as Ivan Ooze forms out of the slimepile. He’s pretty underwhelming. Zedd had been searching for 2000 years to find Ooze and Ooze wants to repay Zedd for breaking him free. Zedd asks Ooze to destroy Zordon and Ooze, wanting revenge for getting locked up, offers to up the ante and destroy Zordon’s legacy so it’s like he never existed. Sheesh this guy is rough. Rita and Ivan are kinda flirty with each other. I hope they fuck (off screen, this is a kids’ movie). Ooze can “smell teenagers” which is our first red flag with this guy. The Rangers arrive to find the egg open and the ooze dripping. A security guard approaches asking what the gang is doing there, when the guard of course turns into Ivan Ooze, complete with creepy laughter to scare the Rangers. They all prepare to fight. The group and Ivan have a little threat-off, Ivan insulting Zordon and the gang by saying Zordon does his dirty work using child soldiers. Ooze sends his henchmen, the Oozemen (seriously) to fight the Rangers as he continues to laugh maniacally before teleporting away. The Oozemen seem a little tougher than the usual Putty Patrol the gang is used to, but fortunately they are high flying martial artists and lure the Oozemen into danger in the construction site while beating them with improvised weapons and their martial arts skills, as they have not Morphed for this. Once they get outnumbered, though, it’s Morphin Time and the Oozemen wait patiently as each Ranger goes through their Morphin sequence. The monsters are always so kind and patient. In that time, the Oozemen have taken off on foot. I like that the movie made a little joke for us who notice this shit.

Back at the command center, Zordon has a premonition that the Rangers didn’t make it in time. Just then, Ivan, shapeshifting into a blob of ooze, leaks himself through the door to evade the rule that no one without a Power Coin can enter the center. Ooze warps Alpha into walking around in circles. Zordon vows Ooze won’t get away with his crimes but Ooze decides to fuck the command center up, discussing historical events he was locked away for, including the Brady Bunch reunion, and I am left wondering how he knows all of these world events when he’s been out for like 15 minutes and he went right to fuckin’ shit up. Also, side note, before starting this movie today, I watched The Brady Bunch Movie and noted that these two movies came out within 5 months of each other in 1995, so it’s really funny to me that Ivan made the connection for me. Anyway, back to Ooze oozing his destruction all over the command center. He causes some major damage while across town, the Rangers continue searching for their new opps. They’re trying to smoke on that Ivan Pack. They get surrounded and attacked by the Oozemen but the Rangers are really good at their jobs and fuck these oozy dorks up. They crush them with a dumpster but as they call for their weapons, they lose their powers and are de-suited up. The communicators don’t work to talk to Alpha and they seemingly can’t teleport. They arrive back at the command center to find it in ruins covered in ooze. They find Zordon in human form outside of his Time Warp, laying on a pile of crystals. Billy declares that he’ll die without gaining power or reentering the Time Warp. Zordon weakly informs the Rangers that the powers, the Zords, all that shit is effectively no more and Zordon is going to die and Ooze will take over the world. The gang pleads with Zordon to live but he is weak. Alpha informs the Rangers they must travel to the planet Phaedos to find an ancient power that can stop Ivan but warns that many have tried to locate this power and none succeeded. He warns them that Zordon won’t last long, but he can keep him held on for now. He also warns the teens that he only has enough power to send them to Phaedos but not enough to get them back. Tommy vows that even without powers, they’re still the Rangers and Alpha siphons the last remaining power of the command center to send the Rangers out.

On the moon, Ivan arrives to greet Rita and Zedd. Rita is pissed that Ooze “allowed” the Rangers to go after the Great Power without stopping them, but Ooze overpowers her and declares himself the leader of their faction, overpowering Rita and Zedd and shrinking them down into a snowglobe to keep them contained where he takes lead over Goldar and Mordant. Ivan hocks a purple loogie onto the ground which turns into Tengu Bird monster warriors who he sends to Phaedos to destroy the Rangers. On Phaedos, the Rangers explore with no oxygen masks or space suits or anything. Phaedos is basically Australia. They find the bone remains of some scary looking creatures as they begin their search for the Great Power. Ivan, meanwhile, plans to turn Angel Grove into zombies and enslave them to dig up his Ecto-Morphicon machines by creating some Ooze in a factory that he’s gonna…sell? I don’t know man, they for sure did not think these plots through that well.

Kimberly and Tommy share a tender moment on some seaside Phaedos rocks worrying about Zordon. They are attacked by the Tengu warriors and mostly duck and dodge as they can’t morph. Fortunately, they can still fight. Seems they are soon outnumbered and the dramatic music playing doesn’t sound good for out heroes. Fortunately, a sexy woman warrior (Gabrielle Fitzpatrick) appears and seems to turn the Tengus obsolete with her staff. We still have an hour of this movie left by the way. I may take a blunt break. She whirls some like whistling nunchaku around which sends the Tengus away off the planet. The Rangers try to thank her, but she threatens them to go back where they came from. They ask about the Great Power and she warns they’ll wind up like all the other bones on the ground after failing to find it. They tell her they were sent by Zordon and she introduces herself as Dulcea, the master warrior of Phaedos. They fill Dulcea in on the situation and she worries about the fate of Earth if they don’t move fast to stop Ivan. Zordon and Alpha try and figure out how to watch the Rangers’ progress.

Ivan has disguised himself as a wizard spokesperson and gives his Ooze away to children to share with their parents. It’s like a purple Gak and it was 1995 so this is an easy-do. Dulcea leads the gang like across the entire planet on foot to a really cool looking ruins from an ancient temple. She points out a huge monolith in the jungle, heavily guarded, where the Great Power resides. She states that since the gang was chosen by Zordon, she believes in them and declares they’ll call on the spirits of the ancient Ninjetti to assist. At Fred’s house, his dad finds his Ooze and opens it to smell it and fingerfuck it, where it turns his dad into a purple-eyed zombie. He joins a throng of other zombie parents on their way to serve Ivan. The news reports on missing parents and shows a commercial for “Ooze City”. Zordon and Alpha state that Ivan’s “evil plot is taking shape” and I am cackling that Zordon was so in fear of a shitty toy commercial campaign enslaving the world. Ooze isn’t even as fun as Tamagotchi. Meanwhile on Phaedos, Dulcea has the rangers look into their spirits to summon their Ninjetti spirits, which all just happen to be the same colors as their previous incarnation. Convenient. Aisha becomes the Bear, Rocky the Ape, Billy the Wolf, Kimberly the Crane, Adam the Frog (including a kiss from Dulcea, win for you buddy) and Tommy the Falcon. She tells them anything is possible with Ninjetti, but they must win on their own, as she would age rapidly like Zordon if she left the site of the ruins. She tells them to trust themselves and let the animal spirits guide them before turning into a snowy owl and flying off.

Fred arrives home to find the loose jar of Ooze and his father missing. He’s probably just grabbing some cigarettes Freddy, he’ll be right back. Ivan and Goldar command zombified adults to dance for their amusement as digging up the Ecto-Morphicons is taking a while. The Tengus arrive back to Ooze and announce that they failed to kill the Rangers. They describe their setbacks and he realizes Dulcea is helping the Rangers find the Great Power to stop him. He commands the workers to hurry up so he can dominate the world before the Rangers return.

At the site of the ruins, the Rangers look over the jungle and head toward the monolith, ready for whatever faces them. They hike through the jungle for a long time, vowing not to give up for Zordon’s sake. Fred, meanwhile, goes to find his dad in a trance busting rocks to unearth the Ecto-Morphicons. Fred’s dad does not even notice him. He hides as he witnesses Ivan, Goldar and Mordant commanding the workers to continue. Mordant retells my favorite joke (“I had a weak back…that was about a week back.”) so I’m pleased. Ivan, as every villain does in every movie when someone is watching from a hiding spot, repeats his evil plan step by step loudly for seemingly no reason. Fred takes note. Over on Phaedos, the Rangers discover tons of bones on their path and Billy takes note that the large fossilized dinosaur-like creatures are actually alive. One springs to life and attacks Aisha and Rocky and soon the whole gang is in peril. Even Tommy, the franchise’s golden boy, has a tough time getting the upper hand. Tommy detaches a bone from the dino’s neck which causes the thing to collapse into a pile.

At the Ooze factory, the villains are commanding some zombie parents to work the Ooze production line while Fred continues to watch from hiding places. Ivan announces that the Ecto-Morphicons are unearthed, but he’s sick of looking at the parents and commands them to walk to the construction site and leap to their death, which they do immediately. Mordant turns a lever and the Ooze flows into the Morphicons, bringing them to life. They’re like big bugs. This is the big evil Zordon is afraid of. In the jungle, the gang reaches the base of the monolith and goes to enter slowly. Tommy goes first and an armored creature emerges from the wall to do battle. Then some more emerge. They all have weapons. The Rangers need to summon their Ninjetti powers and they do just that. They find out the monsters are made of stone and prove to be a challenge. The gang persists and, as to be expected 2/3 the way through the movie, end up defeating the rock monsters which opens the stone gate to the monolith. Looks like the Rangers found the Great Power! Great, now let’s get back to California and rescue Zordon and banish Ivan and tie a neat bow on this adventure. So, to gain the Great Power, you have to defeat one bone monster and three stone monsters? That’s it? These kids can do that on a Thursday. Smh. Anyway, the Great Power bestows itself upon the Rangers and they gain new, updated Power suits and Morphers and communicators and Zords and shit. Actually, just the gold emblem on their chests have updated. They still have helmets corresponding to their previous Zords LMAO this movie is so shitty with details. The gang teleports back to the command center and Dulcea, watching, wishes them luck.

In Angel Grove, the Ecto joints are causing mass chaos but I don’t see how these things are able to “enslave all humanity” like Zordon said. These things truly don’t seem that bad, especially after like 120 episodes where they routinely destroy much larger monsters. The Rangers arrive back downtown to find not only a ton of destruction, but the Ecto-Morphicons coming at them. It’s Zord time! The new Ninja Zords are summoned while Ivan and Goldar watch in worry. The zombie parents walk off chanting “leap to our doom” in a trance. Meanwhile, Fred is off watching a yard full of kids and teens acting wild without parents, playing in Ooze and wearing purple clothes. Fred announces Ivan’s plan to the party and tells the kids to follow him to stop Ivan or their parents’ lives are at risk. Downtown, the Zords are finding the Morphicons to be a tough match. I understand they need to pad out the screen time, but they should have all just morphed into Megazord immediately. Clearly the Frog Zord that’s 1/20 the size of the Ectos isn’t gonna take them out. Fred leads the group of kids onto a monorail which he conducts because there are apparently no adults left in the city. Kimberly attempts to divebomb with her Crane Zord, but Ivan’s laser powers incapacitate the Zord temporarily and she flies off. None of the Zords can do battle on their own. Tommy whips the Falcon Zord back in battle mode and missile-fries the shit out of one of the Ectos. They trap the other on a dead-end street and Ivan’s pissed. He morphs into a long pile of ooze and possesses the other Ecto, turning it into a giant bug Ivan as Goldar flies away. Uh oh! Big Ivan destroys the monorail track and the Rangers crank out the Ninja Megazord. Tommy goes to save the monorail, saying he’ll dock onto Megazord once he’s done, and the rest of the Rangers go into battle mode and draw the Power Sword. Tommy flies the Falcon Zord right onto the track to patch the missing area, seamlessly rolling the kids onward.

Large Ivan destroys the Power Sword and damages Megazord. Tommy flies in as Ivan launches Megazord through a skyscraper, damaging Megazord. Tommy attaches and Ninja Megazord is in ultimate mode or whatever the fuck. They set course to battle in outer space, so as not to further damage the city. Ivan gives chase as the zombie parents continue to march toward their death, chanting. The kids form a human wall to stop them and Fred takes Bulk and Skull with him down under the cliff to attempt to help. Up in space, Billy gets a genius idea: lead Ivan into the path of Ryan’s Comet. Good thing that comet was due to come around! It’ll kill Ivan easily. Down at the site, Fred, Bulk and Skull use a giant construction vehicle with what looks like a huge hose? to shoot water at the zombie parents and keep them off the edge. Ivan catches up with Megazord around the moon and Megazord goes into critical mode as they enter the comet’s path. Aisha breaks an emergency panel that knees Ivan in the nuts (?????????) to break his grip as Ryan’s Comet comes around the corner, obliterating Ivan into space dust and instantly knocking the parents back out of their trances. The kids and parents happily reunite, Freddy and his dad happiest of all. Bulk and Skull hug, too. I like that they’re good guys in this movie, but I’m sad they didn’t play the tuba music that played on the show anytime they entered a room.

The Rangers make it back to the command center, but Alpha declares that it’s too late for Zordon. He’s dead. The Rangers all begin to cry. Tommy reminds them that all things are possible with those who possess the Great Power. They literally combine forces to use the power of the Christian god to resurrect Zordon and it’s fucking dope. Of course, this works but somehow Zordon is back in the time warp as a big head. I think it’s because he needs to be on his home planet to exist outside that thing but whatever, who fucking cares. The team has a happy reunion. Later, at a restaurant, the Rangers and Fred feast on crab legs as Bulk and Skull try and tell listeners that they saved the day. Tommy declares Fred a hero and Aisha tells him maybe he’ll be a Ranger one day. Fireworks go off with a thank you message to the Rangers and that’s our movie. Oh wait, there’s a credits scene but it’s stupid. Goldar sits in Zedd’s throne pretending to be in charge but Rita and Zedd are freed from the snowglobe and come back to punish them. THAT’s our movie.

So no, this does not hold up as well as it did in 1995 when I was 7 years old and obsessed with this franchise, but aside from it being really easy as an adult to tell where they were just wasting time with “cool” scenes and effects to drag out the runtime, this was a fun watch whether or not you give a fuck about the Power Rangers. It’s a good popcorn flick that’s very dumb but not so dumb that it’s unenjoyable. I can’t truly say I’m biased despite being obsessed as a kid. I genuinely think this one is a decent watch. If you feel like checking for yourself, click that Power Coin into your Morpher and search for this one on YouTube, as it’s not on any streaming service at the moment. Keep it a secret, but it’s not an ”official” upload. It is, however, a better picture quality than most official uploads I do watch on YouTube. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.

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