PicoBlog

From the moment I first saw the trailer for “No Hard Feelings” I’ve eagerly awaited its release. Jennifer Lawrence is one of my favorite actresses on earth not to mention drop dead gorgeous. Plus, trailer clips looked absolutely hilarious and make this a must-see. For those who don’t know, the premise revolves around Maddie (Jennifer Lawrence) being a down-on-her-luck woman who had her car repossessed and finds herself in danger of losing her house. She answers an ad from (rich) parents that offer her a Buick in exchange for getting their son, Percy out of his introverted shell AKA banging him. What ensues, or is supposed to anyway is hilarity. Does this coming-of-age raunchy rom-com actually deliver? Here’s my takes…  

PROS: No surprise given I literally just admitted to having a Jennifer Lawrence pro-bias so yeah, I utterly enjoyed her in this film. We already knew from her Oscar-winning performance in Silver Linings Playbook not to mention smash hit franchises like X-Men and The Hunger Games she possesses serious acting chops, but I didn’t expect her to shine in physical comedy like this. I felt a little Kristen Wiig comparable with Jennifer here as she’s head-and-shoulders the best thing about No Hard Feelings. Most of the movie’s elite moments revolve around her and in particular scenes involving the beach and a high school/future Princeton party, where she says with perfect comedic timing “doesn’t anyone fuck anymore.” Seriously, without giving too much away her physical comedy at times is on another level.  

Also, Andrew Barth Feldman, an actor I previously never heard of was pretty good as Percy.  His growth from the awkwardly shy high school senior transformed into someone with confidence is fun to watch, even if not completely organic.  Props by the way to the writers for making Percy 19 years old even though he’s still a high school senior. It sounds significantly less creepier than being 18 for the purpose of this movie.

Circling back to Jennifer Lawrence, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention an extended J-law full frontal naked scene among the movie’s biggest pros. And by extended I mean far more than just a glimpse. So much in fact, I wondered if they had some kind of CGI/body double do the deed but nope, Lawrence confirmed in interviews it was all her and she had no second thoughts about doing it. .Cha-ching!

CONS: Unfortunately the plot’s painfully predictable---unoriginal and nothing we haven’t seen several times before. Essentially what you’re getting here is equal parts Failure to Launch, Can’t Buy Me Love, She’s All That and American Pie(s). The down on her luck beauty is paid to get the quiet nerdy kid out of his timed shell before he shuffles off to college because----well, who the hell actually knows why his parents care.

Speaking of, what kind of fucking parents are Laird and Allison Becker? They hire a woman 13 years Percy’s senior to essentially have sex with him so he loosens up and isn’t a tight ass before attending Princeton in the fall?

Also, and I must drop a mini-spoiler here, but the part where they’re at dinner and Percy plays the piano while tenderly singing Hall & Oates’ “Maneater” to near perfection is agitating. One hand it’s brilliant and Maddie’s visibly moved by it (I did enjoy her expressions). That said, it makes you wonder at what point did Percy wake up and basically become Barry Manilow? There’s not much an inkling before the scene that Percy’s so musically gifted and again, how shitty of his parents to not know this. So yeah, I would’ve been more pleased if he sucked but was going for it in the moment anyway. That could’ve been a pinnacle moment of the kid coming out of his shell even if he sucked but instead the piano playing/singing had me thinking Percy’s just legitimately stupid for not having already pursued music for passion (and chicks) long before Maddie came along.

Lastly, while I enjoyed a big chunk of this movie I was left unsatisfied with the third act and ending. A business transaction turns into significant human emotions— again, boringly predictable and generic. It would’ve been nice if there could’ve been a twist we never saw coming at the conclusion instead of an ending pretty much telegraphed—can’t really go much further and keep this a non-spoiler review.  

RANDOM OBSERVATION: A controversy I’ve seen tossed around criticizes this movie as promoting adult grooming---more specifically a 32-year old women attempting to coerce a 19-year old young man/teenager into having sex. To those in the fun police publicly bitching about that I simply say---fuck off.  It’s a completely FICTIONAL coming-of-age comedy. It’s literally meant to be cringy and raunchy, so kindly remove the stick from your ass and enjoy a laugh or two in your life.

VERDICT/GRADE: I’ll be perfectly honest---if this starred nearly any other actress not named Jennifer Lawrence I probably wouldn’t have enjoyed it as much.  That’s the J-Law effect—she makes a decent movie good and a good movie great and No Hard Feelings is 100% character performance driven. Even with her I can’t put it on the same pedestal as the great earlier this century rom-coms like Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Bridesmaids or Wedding Crashers nor does the nerdy boy becoming a man have the same appeal as Patrick Dempsey in Can’t Buy Me Love back in the day.

That said, No Hard Feelings is solidly entertaining with plenty of laugh out loud moments and enough investment in both characters to give a shit about them and hell, even have you up in your feels.  At bare minimum it’s certainly worth watching and at it’s best it’s a welcomed throwback to how fun raunchy rom-coms used to be. This feels like a flick I’ll be watching reruns of several times on USA Network or TNT for years to come. GRADE: B

(Patrick Moran turns his inability to articulate thoughts and use fancy words on paper into easy-to-read reviews for the audience. Eat shit, New York Times and Variety Fair movie reviewers of the world.)

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