PicoBlog

Many in this sphere are current or future parents, thinking about how they’ll raise their kids to be well-adjusted and have good values in an increasingly pozzed America. My parents succeeded in this—they raised all of their children (including me) to be based and healthy, even living in a blue neighborhood where school, peers, and culture were against them. My aim with this essay is to help other parents do that too.

I have a friend—let’s call her Sarah—whose parents are typical Christian conservatives. They took great care to raise her in a way that would protect her from bad influences and pass on their values. She couldn’t watch PG-13 movies until she was 13, or R-rated movies until she was 18. They monitored her Internet usage, even going so far as to read her text messages. When she got a car, they installed a GPS on it so they could know where she was at all times. In addition to this, they took the family to church every week.

In elementary and middle school, Sarah’s beliefs aligned with those of her parents. (In fact, we initially bonded over being two of the only conservatives at our liberal middle school). But then, due to the influence of both friends and social media, she slowly started moving left. Sarah is now a proud self-described feminist and anti-racist, and she cuts her hair shorter every year.

She still has a pretty good relationship with her parents, but she views them as people who “just don’t get it.” With regards to her Christian education in Sunday school, she’s told me she feels like she was “lied to.” She says she doesn’t plan to have her own children—she wants to adopt a disabled child instead.

What went wrong here? BAP sums it up pretty well:

Sarah’s parents made themselves into convenient foils for the regime. When she rebelled—and almost every teen will rebel against something—it was against her “reactionary” parents.

At this point, there’s a temptation to say they should have protected her even harder—why did they let her get social media or use the Internet at all? Why was she having conversations with left-wing peers instead of being homeschooled? This might have prolonged her rebellion by a few years, but ultimately, this argument misses the point.

Unless you’re Amish, Mennonite, or similar, you cannot shelter your kids. Even if you succeed at it up until age 18, they’re still going to need to go to college or start working, and eventually live on their own.

You can and should protect your kids from the worst excesses of leftist degeneracy (no need to bring them to Drag Queen Story Hour), but trying to escape the influence of wokeness altogether is a fool’s errand. Your kids will be exposed eventually. Your job as a parent is to inoculate them against it so it won’t destroy them and derail their lives.

Sheltering your kids and having them get exposed to wokeness all at once at 18 will do about the same thing that smallpox arriving from Europe did to the Native Americans.

My parents didn’t shelter me, but they didn’t need to. They had successfully channeled my desire to rebel against the state/regime rather than against them.

That’s the basic idea, but how can you implement it in practice?

The first and most important thing is to have a good relationship with your children. Spend time with them, listen to them, tell them you’re proud of them, and try to cultivate a relationship of mutual love and trust. The fact that I love my parents and feel like I can tell them anything was a prerequisite to everything else good that came out of our relationship, including the fact that I eventually adopted their values.

This doesn’t mean you should be “best friends” with your kids though, or that you should treat them as peers. You want to be trustworthy—if you say you’re going to do something, follow through on it—and worthy of your kids’ respect.

Second, humor is critical. Being angry, sanctimonious, and bitter is the fastest way to take on the role of a foil to the regime. We live in clown world. It’s never been easier to notice, mock, and laugh at the absurdity of modern life. Kids love having fun. Have fun with it!

Third, you must know what you believe and why. Kids are curious, and they won’t be satisfied by “just because”—enforcing rules or teaching principles without being able to explain the *why* behind them just makes you look like a tyrant. My dad put it more succinctly: “explain reasons, don’t just give rules.”

You can’t expect to pass on your values to your kids if you yourself don’t have a good grasp on what these values are. Knowing what you believe and why is no easy task and will probably require a lot of reflection on your part. I would suggest trying to write down what you believe in detail, as a starting point.

I was a unique kid in that I had a very deep interest in politics and related topics. I was largely redpilled through long political conversations I had with my dad, as well as through reading things (essays, blog posts, books, memes) he sent or recommended to me. I don’t think this is the path for most kids, though.

So fourth, as BAP notes, it’s important to lead by example. If you want your kids to care for the environment, take them camping. If you want them to treasure their culture, take them to the symphony or read them great books. If you want them to value strength and fitness, play sports with them. Try to give your kids a sense of connection to the past and to the future. Without these anchors, people are rudderless and will latch onto the first piece of driftwood that floats by.

Leading by example applies to the relationship between you and your spouse as well. You should strive to embody the kind of marriage you someday want your kids to have with their future husbands/wives. I’m blessed to have parents who did a very good job of this. Modern dating and relationships can be confusing, as shared expectations around relationships, sex and marriage slowly crumble in favor of a culture where anything goes as long as everyone consents. When I’m overwhelmed by all the contradictory viewpoints on these subjects, I can step back and say “okay, no need to overthink this—I’ll just do it the way my parents did it.” This is a gift I hope all parents can give their children.

Your kids probably won’t end up adopting your exact political views, which is fine. If you set a good example for them in terms of health, relationships, lifestyle, and attitude they will still be able to understand the world and live the good life.

If you have questions or thoughts on this article, feel free to leave a comment or reach out to me on twitter @moonbeamdreams_. Thanks for reading!

ncG1vNJzZmiln6S7o7HAppurnZGiwG%2B%2F1JuqrZmToHuku8xop2innmK9or7Ep6uippc%3D