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I stumbled across the Dorito Theory on Tiktok and I’m shook. Look — there isn’t anything radically disruptive here, but I just love it when someone puts a name to something I can fully relate to, and describes it in a way that makes me feel seen.

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, I’ve included the video below but for this email’s purpose I’ve transcribed the key parts as well.

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“Only experiences that aren’t truly satisfying are seriously addictive. Imagine eating Doritos. When you eat a Dorito and finish your bite you're not fully satisfied. It's not the same as eating a steak or eating a really satiating food that's high in protein and you feel the fullness and warmth of satisfaction. Eating chips is addictive because the peak of the experience is when you’re first tasting it and not after. There's nothing that exists once the experience or moment is done. 

The experience itself is not satisfying in the end. It's kind of the micro moment of “having” that is the satisfying part. I think this applies to a lot of very addictive things in life like the infinite scroll on TikTok. You're never satisfied after you engage in the behavior. It's just that micro moment hitting the scroll when the dopamine comes.

Imagine the tradeoff between eating an amazing steak versus eating an entire bag of potato chips. There's no turn-off mechanism in your brain for the potato chips. Where as with the steak there might actually be… you're not going to overeat. It sounds intense but I recommend removing anything that falls in the Dorito category.”

Only experiences that aren’t truly satisfying are seriously addictive. Oof. I think about alcohol and the idea of satisfaction as an illusion. Because where is it? It’s certainly not in the anticipation of it. It’s not in the first sip (though that’s probably the closest you’ll get) and it’s clearly not after the first or fourth drink. It’s nowhere because there is no genuine satisfaction in drinking.

The addictive behavior comes from continually seeking satisfaction or fullness in something not designed to produce that feeling. I think of the line “Have one, have twenty more "one mores" and oh it does not relent” from The Good Times are Killing Me by Modest Mouse. Addiction is an endless cycle of ‘one mores’ hoping this next one will do the trick.

Compare it to drinking ice cold water after a big workout in the glaring summer heat. You’re parched, your throat is dry and your insides are baking like bread in the oven. You pound that water and you feel it lace your throat and immediately cool your body. After a few sips, or even gulps, you feel good — settled — and satisfied. You don’t crave more because your needs have been met.

But when you consider someone like me (problem drinkers)? Our bodies can’t make that signal with addictive substances because there is never a feeling of done. I imagine a machine in my body that works like a metal detector for alcohol. It sits there idly until it senses alcohol consumption is imminent. Then it starts to beep and ring and get excited, but there’s no stop button, so it just keeps sounding off and squealing for more. Just like a metal detector never signals “Metal quota met. You can go sit down now.” Once our alcohol radar is up, it’s job is to detect and procure more alcohol, and every time I drink and expect it to operate differently? I’m setting us both up to fail.

The key is recognizing and distinguishing “Dorito” substances and activities and understanding their purpose. Alcohol is not designed to feel satisfying — no addictive substance is. When we make peace with this, maybe we can stop chasing the elusive ‘one more’ in this unsatisfying search for satisfaction.

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Each week I will offer one of my favorite tips, quotes, affirmations, resources, or exercises to step up your sobriety. I hope these will be invaluable resources for your sober journey and well worth your money and time. This section is for paid subscribers only.

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