PicoBlog

A shorter Friday post this week. There’s a chat in the Substack app about the situation between Megan Thee Stallion and Nicki Minaj. On Sunday I’ll start a live chat about the Grammys too.

When Taylor Swift embraced her football boyfriend after his football victory at the football game last Sunday, I could only think: “Oh my God. Those nails.”

They are boxy square nails of medium length, in the color bedazzled vomit or glitter jaundice. They are thick with alternating layers of glitter and polish. (Just a regular glitter polish would have accomplished this, I’m guessing.) I assumed they were press-ons because her Eras tour manicures were Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat nails, or whatever you want to call it when each finger is a different color. (If you’re wondering what specific outfit this matched: none very well.) But that manicure appeared to be her natural nails, short enough so she could play guitar onstage. 

I posted about the nails to my IG story when I first saw them, because they had unsettled my spirit so thoroughly. Those nails are these shoes; these nails say to me “Bless her heart.” Many people replied that Swift does her nails herself, per the Miss Americana doc. One person replied that Taylor Swift had painted one of her nails, like one single nail, at a party one time. (Swift sent her bodyguard home to fetch her nail kit. Lol.) Some people suggested this was the Brittany Mahomes effect and … Brittany Mahomes can catch a lot of strays, but these nails seem all Swift.

There is something fascinating about the way perhaps the most famous non-Julia Roberts white woman in the world chooses to present herself. I’ve seen the theory circulated online (and sometimes in the comment section of this newsletter) that Taylor Swift has to dress like a girl waiting to get picked up from Woodland Hills Mall because approachability is part of her brand. Beyoncé is the impenetrable, divine, musical savant; Ariana has the voice and the curious taste in partners. Dua Lipa can’t dance but she’s so cool. Onstage at the Eras Tour, sitting at a piano, Taylor Swift talks about being lonely and covered in cat hair. (She is a billionaire.)

Travis Kelce and his little SSENSE cart outdress Swift at every opportunity, not that he has to try very hard. But I don’t buy it, the idea that the ugly dress ugly shoes quality of everything she wears is a savvy way to perform her relatability. Lauren Sherman, who writes a dishy Puck newsletter about the fashion business, wrote a very smart newsletter about why it doesn’t make sense for this galactically famous person to have a high fashion contract. “Swift doesn’t need to be the face of a fashion brand: she makes far more money than most actresses, and her image is so carefully controlled that any deal would need to feel exactly right, and at the right price, for her to say yes,” Sherman wrote. “You could argue that her persona, which remains very young despite the fact that she is firmly in her 30s—Christ’s age, to be exact—doesn’t naturally align with any luxury brands, which either choose famous people who match their aesthetic perfectly (Chanel is good at this) or have such a flimsy idea of fashion that they are easy to mold.” I suspect another part of this is that Swift’s demo isn’t likely to significantly move the needle on or create a moment around a luxury good she’d wear, like Katie Holmes wearing that Khaite sweater.

What’s more: We’ve seen the “Bejeweled” music video, which Swift directed. (I’m not bringing up the “Karma” video, which she also directed, out of kindness.) I wouldn’t describe that directorial effort as evidence of her being a real visual aesthete or tastemaker. I mean … it’s called “Bejeweled” and she walks around a studio space wearing Party City rhinestones.

So no: I don’t think the nails are some play at reliability. In a fascinating way, she is local. Maybe a nail kit will one day be her Rhode or her Rare. If nothing else, can’t wait to see what her Pinterest board has on it for the Usher concert next Sunday (the Super Bowl), an event in which her boyfriend (who is not Usher) will be playing catch with some other guys (who are also not Usher).

What the Paid List Got This Week

I wrote about some movies I watched in January (Godzilla Minus One, Postcards from the Edge, The Zone of Interest), and a little bit about my personal life lately. You can read it here:

God Brings You To It (Boston) to Bring You Through It (Also Boston)
Ayo Edebiri is hosting Saturday Night Live tomorrow night, with musical guest Jennifer Affleck dba J.Lo. My first thought was “Amazing!!!!” My second thought was “Matt Damon is plummeting in the famous Bostonian rankings.” Damon was … fine in Air? Ben Affleck gets to hang out on his wife’s work trip.

Ayo Edebiri on Instagram: “one for grid bc I still can’t believe it”

February 3, 2024

The iconic, cross-generational, never-been-done-before Boston link-up that could happen between these two iconic Bostonians, Ayo Edebiri and J.Lo’s husband. Will they talk about Dunkin’ … reloading their CharlieCards … the organizational instability of the Patriots … the power that will come from them saying “Billerica” alone … not that Billerica would come up in conversation, but just imagine it does … 

That’s all this week! Thank you for reading. Tomorrow morning I’m seeing Oppenheimer again. I’m such a loser; I can’t wait! I cannot stop thinking about the scene where Harry S. Truman (Gary Oldman) glares at Oppenheimer and calls him a nerd with main character syndrome.

And one more reminder: Grammys chat Sunday night!

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