When A Restaurant Leans Gay
What makes a restaurant gay is a question I think about often. Is it the fact that it is gay-owned? Is it the branding/marketing of the place? Or is it the patronage of the venue, the ‘who’s primarily eating there at any given time’ that makes a dining establishment lean more queer? There are, in fact, many possible answers to the question, and historically, there has not been just one singular path that a restaurant has taken for it to turn into a queer haven. In today’s slightly more accepting world, however, the more urgent questions being posed are whether gay restaurants even still need to exist, and whether the dwindling landscape of queer eateries is a trend that will continue to head down its currently plummeting path.
A 1994 NYTimes article entitled “Restaurants That Roll Out the Welcome Mat for Gay Diners” highlighted many of the food establishments in NYC at the time that for decades catered to a predominantly homosexual clientele. These included the likes of Food Bar, Lucky Cheng's, and Universal Grill, all now long gone. Twenty-seven years later, Erik Piepenburg for the NYTimes wrote a follow up article, where he mentioned that in New York City in particular, “gay restaurants are going the way of dinosaurs.”
In today's newsletter, I’m taking a deeper dive into Rocking Horse Cafe, a restaurant that perhaps had no intention of being gay when it first opened, but which simply based on a matter of timing and location turned into a popular mecca for many LGBTQ+ people. Located at 182 8th Avenue between West 19th and 20th Streets, Rocking Horse Cafe was a Mexican restaurant located in the heart of Manhattan's Chelsea neighborhood that for 30 years served as a much beloved hangout and food spot for the neighboring LGBTQ community, boasting a colorful rainbow logo and a very popular happy hour.
Rocking Horse Cafe was first opened in 1988 by Roe Di Bona & Marvin Beck, a heterosexual couple who were inspired by their first drive through the Sierra Madres and love of all things Mexican to offer the very best sustainable, local, and organic Mexican cuisine to the people of NYC and to its visitors from around the world.
Rocking Horse's opening in Chelsea coincided rather perfectly with the great migration north of LGBTQ folk from Greenwich Village during the early '90s, and it quickly became a central hangout for many queer friends to gather at for brunch or before a night of going out. Rocking Horse soon began to frequently hold Pride events during the month of June, even bringing in DJs such as Brandon D’Lux to play sets during meals.
One of my favorite things featured on Rocking Horse Cafe’s still existent website is a series of hand-penned comics by Karl, creator of TheRegularsComic.com, who went to Rocking Horse with his partner Alan so frequently that he created a whole series of drawings on the restaurant’s DÍGANOS comment cards during some of their many visits. The series is like a cute little queer comic book commemorating the couple’s many dates there together, while forever memorializing the many delicious dishes served at Rocking Horse.
Over the years, many other Rocking Horse patrons memorialized their love for the place by leaving reviews, raving about the drinks, the food, and the boys at the establishment: Matt M. wrote: "Lots of pretty boys; can be noisy--depends on the timing; great music selection; top 10 margaritas and chips and great salsa at the bar."
Yolanda S. mentioned: "I love this place. It is such a great spot to get fresh Mexican food, especially the beef. I take people here who want a good meal without breaking the bank...The bonus is you never know if your waiter is going to bust out into a song and dance. It is in Chelsea, honey!"
Mark J. added: "Sunday brunch is a long time tradition when we come to NY for the Westminster dog shows. Their food puts an interesting twist on Mexican cuisine. Always start with a Mimosa and don't forget the guacamole!"
At the end of October 2018, Rocking Horse Cafe closed suddenly, after being a constant in the neighborhood for 30 years. Based on posts from Roe Di Bona, it would appear that her husband and co-owner Marvin Beck had passed away around that time. Frequent patron Cory A. mourned the loss of Rocking Horse best: "Just found out another one of my favorite 90's Chelsea NYC haunts is GONE. Missing my 20s right now...Farewell Rocking Horse Cafe. I will miss the sidewalk gawks and the best nachos and frozen drinks in the city!!!"
Other patrons also commented their memories and love for the place:
Camilla Slattery-Eidenberg (camilla_s_e) said: “Loved that place!”
Bre (babybreyon) wrote: “I dream about their salsa everyday 😭”.
mxdalloway recalled: “I used to work a couple blocks away and would come at lunch with a straight friend and get the chicken soup and a glass of sav blanc. That soup was sooo good.”
182 8th Avenue is now home to ZiZi, a Mediterranean restaurant with a far less colorful exterior. Roe Di Bona, meanwhile, is now an Executive and Life Coach.
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